[LINK] Link Institute Needs Help
Wed, 18 Sep 2002 11:05:39 +1000
The Nigerian spam has clearly developed into a new art form. I
received one the other day purporting to be from white Zimbabwean
farmers who were prepared to share with me a substantial percentage of
some huge sum of money they needed to get out of the country.
After receiving a Nigerian spam titled "PLEASE LISTEN TO MY CRYING":
- - - -
I am miss Patience Epue,
Final year student of Ambrose Alli university, Nigeria.
I have urgent and very confidential business
and an assistance for you.
There was a foreigner called Engr. Barry Kelly,
a Foreign Oil consultant/contractor
with the Nigerian
National Petroleum Corporation, Mr.Barry Kelly, I met him 1997 and
we develope a marriage affairs.
He proposed to marry me but my parents were never in
support of my affairs with him but i insisted
. . .
My surposed husband Engr. Barry,
died on moto accident on the 24th of april 2002.
He died without a WILL, and all attempts to trace his next of kin
or any relation was fruitless.
. . . they as well rejected my pregnatcy and even after given birth,
all my request for them to cater for the child has been fruitless.
So because of the bad treatment i received from his family, i now
hold to my chest the particulars of the funds $20,500.000.00, with
the security company.
. . .
The cash in question is to the tone of
US$ 20,500,000.00(TWENTY MILLION,FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLAS)
Upon your acceptance of this offer, i have aggreed
to share this fund with you as 30% for you,
50% for me, 10% for ophanage, and 10% for any expenses.
. . .
Please observe utmost confidentiality, and rest
assured that this
transaction would be most profitable for both of us
because I shall
require your assistance to invest my share in your
properties like houses, hotels etc)
. . .
Please treat me as your sister, daughter and the
misrable future of the just born baby by a student
without father.Waiting to hear from you soon.
Miss Patience Epue
- - -
the operatic potential of this genre became obvious.
If I had nothing better to do, I would get a bunch of these spams and
feed them to a Mark V. Chaney program:
which is a probabilistic text generator which synthesises text from a
tree of probabilities by which words are found in the input text. Its a
blender-like process which, with the right quantity of input text,
generates fresh material which generally maintains enough of the syntax
and low-level word groupings and punctuation, to make reasonable
sentences and some kind of sense, but has discontinuities which can be
Then I would get a bunch of open-source speech synthesis, audio software
etc. together with Csound and my binaural additions to Csound and create
what might be the world's first totally software synthesised binaural
Seeding the input text with this business proposal from the Link
institute would surely give the resulting magnum opus a special
This would be the fun side of postmodernism! To hell with all the
earnest relativism and reducing everything to a text!
For Link list information see http://sunsite.anu.edu.au/link/