[LINK] The PLAN, and broadband speeds?

[Pilcher, Fred]

Yesterday I sent the following letter to the editor at the SMH.

My hit rate tends to be about 30% but it didn't get picked up today, so this was probably one of the 70% (although a more generic letter that I penned a couple of weeks ago got in today).

No doubt Linkers will suitably chastise me for errors of fact or implication.

* * *

Gerard Kirwan of Cremorne asks (letters, 21/6/07) how to get to the information superhighway.

Easy, Gerard. Head down Dialup Ave (careful, there's a 1kph speed limit). Turn right into  Telstra Close, which is a toll road and a dead end these days, so you have to turn around at the bottom of the hill (watch out for potholes). Cross over the road and continue along Fraudband St (speed limit 20kph). At the end you'll come to a blocked-off T intersection. This is the superhighway you seek.

To your right will be Private Broadband Turnpike. When it's built, you'll be able to drive at exhilarating speed(unless you live in the bush, where the road narrows and the speed limit comes down to 80kph, 40kph or 1kph depending on how many people there are on the road, or 0 if you live behind a hill or it's raining.) It'll be privately owned. You can already see the huge gleaming tollgates under construction - your taxes are paying for those, though the tolls will go to the owners.

To your left will be Public Broadband Freeway. When it's built you'll also be able to cruise all day at top speed, though it'll bypass some of the more far-flung rural locations at first. You'll invest in it through your taxes (the way streets used to be funded) and the tolls will come back to you and your kids. Ultimately we'll all make a buck out of it and at least there's the possibility that we'll decide to use the profits to extend it to the few places it didn't go at first. Wherever it does go, the speed limit will be the same.

So turn around, head slowly back down Fraudband St, along Telstra Close (careful of cowboys with six-shooters) to Dialup Ave, and back home to wait until one or the other is built. Sit back, get relaxed and comfortable, imagine the wind in your hair and the open road stretching out ahead of you, and contemplate which we'll build come election time.

* * *

Cheers,

Fred 
  
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